You'll Ask Yourself....WTF????

This is nine kinds of awesome. I don't know what the purpose of this video is but, who really cares....

Watch the whole thing, and you will ask yourself... WTF???




Read more ...

Hazard Ahead

Those gals over at McAfee have come up with their list of most "dangerous" celebs in cyberspace. Fans searching online for Jessica Biel have a one-in-five chance of hitting a web site with malware, according to the third annual report listing Hollywood's most "dangerous" online celebrities.

This makes the curvacious star 2009's most dangerous, edging out Beyonce and Jennifer Aniston. I hope this dubious distinction doesn't have the chilling effect of discouraging tinseltown's young hotties from posing for revealing photos.



Read more ...

A Special Gift

With the days of summer nearly half gone, I've come across an amazing product that deserves your attention.

A German company has invented a marvelous new bikini that disappears once a girl puts it on and takes a swim.


The "Get Naked" bikini is all the rage in Germany. Why?... Well duh....

Get one HERE for your special someone today!!



Read more ...

What Bo Don't Know

Bo don't know...

What T-Pain sounds like without auto-tune
Who the hell Paris Hilton and Perez Hilton are
How they put the wonder in Wonder bread
Why Amy Winehouse won’t go to rehab
What’s going on with the economic bailout plan
The Colonel’s secret recipe
How nobody has yet to figure out that Clark Kent is Superman
Jack, cause Bo can't rap


Read more ...

The Hova Pie

Saw this on Jay-Z's excel workbook....







Read more ...

Top 100 Celebrity Nude Scenes

Good ole Mr. Skin has provided over the years a grandiose assortment of videos for your spank bank. But to be honest who has the time to sort through all of the titillating information. Well luckily, the guys over at Mr. Skin have just finished putting together their list of the Top 100 Celebrity Nude Scenes.

They've crowned Phoebe Cates' pool scene, from "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" as the ultimate all-time nude scene.

Take a peek to see where your favorite celeb ranked on the list.






Read more ...

Tom & Jerry With A Mental Five

The other day I heard some crazy, over-the-top, Harry-Met-Sally type, monkey-sex noises going on next door. I mean this was like a cartoon. Bumping and banging and crashing - in my head I imagined it like a Tom and Jerry cartoon where there is just a tornado of dust and limbs where lamps start crashing and suddenly a cat squeals.

But the main noise was a loud girl's voice, panting, "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!"

Dude was hittin' it. I gave him a "Mental High Five!" to represent.

MENTAL FIVE!!!!

Then it ended and I went on with my life. Ok I giggled for a few hours with the wife and THEN went on with my life.

But the next morning, the most amazing thing happened - we both walked out of our apartments at exactly the same time.

I didn't know what to do! Do I ask her if she is ok because I heard some noises last night? Do I ask her if her lamp broke because it sounded expensive? Should I ask her not to pray so loudly?

But I just did what any mature individual would do - I followed her down the stairs giggling all the way to my car. As soon as I got into my car I called the wife to explain what happened - in my excited state all I could get out was:

"Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god!"

Her answer?

"That's what she said."


Read more ...

Not So Complicated

Guys are simple. I have no idea why girls can't figure this out. In fact, Vanilla Ice even spelled it out pretty clearly in his hit song "Ice, Ice, Baby"

"If you gotta problem, yo, I'll solve it."

BAM! Lyrical genius.

Guys see the entire world that way - what is the problem, how can I fix it?

Here is an example of a guy's train of thought -

"Hmmm, my toothbrush looks like Carrot Top's head...I better go buy a new one."

Guy then goes to the store, picks up some random toothbrush based on some factor - extra bristles, tongue cleaner, Superman logo - and takes it to the counter and pays whatever price is for that toothbrush because that toothbrush is obviously the best.

Girls - no chance.

A girl will come home from the store with a stack of eight toothbrushes because her "favorite" toothbrush was on sale for a "crazy deal".

We, as guys, don't understand this.

Who needs eight toothbrushes? Maybe Jewel because her snaggle tooth rips those puppies to shreds, but what normal girl needs eight toothbrushes?

Second, who has a FAVORITE toothbrush? I, apparently, don't have enough intimacy with my toothbrush to have developed a lasting relationship. I have no idea what brand it is or any distinguishing features. I know it has this, like, handle thingy...and maybe some bristles on the end. I can't confirm that. If you asked me to name my favorite toothbrush I would say the giant one in Pee Wee's Big Adventure.

Finally, how do girls know how much a toothbrush costs to do a comparative analysis? When my toothbrush kicks the bucket and it is time to buy a new one - CVS could name any price they wanted. If I walked in and every toothbrush was $30 I wouldn't blink. My brain is too busy debating Megan Fox vs Alessandra Ambrosio to contain information about Oral-B.

Or maybe I'm just pissed my new toothbrush doesn't have a Superman logo.



Read more ...

Superman Pwns Batman

Read more ...

I Want Some!!!! (NSFW, kinda)

Read more ...

Jennifer's Body Red Band Trailer

Megan Fox as a bi-sexual killer.... AWESOME!!!





Read more ...

Overslept

You know who I feel bad for? That guy in the office that always seems to end up having overslept his alarm and gets to work a half hour late!!!

OMG, can you imagine the thought!!!

Getting TOO much sleep?

So much sleep that you have to say that you actually OVERslept!!!

Oh the horror! Poor guy probably woke up all fully rested and without the ringing headache the rest of us get from the scream of the alarm clock.

I’ll tell you what a real problem is – UNDERsleeping. That fact that I wake up 20 minutes before the alarm goes off every single day.... sucks.

Do you know what you can do with those extra 20 minutes?

Absolutely fucking nothing, that’s what!

You can’t fall back asleep because the very second you finally do fall back to sleep you know your alarm is gonna go off. There’s some loopy time/space continuum that forces this to happen.

So what do I do? I get up. Make myself some toast, and turn on the news just in time to catch the story about the squirrel that was shot in a possible gang related incident. WTF?!? Oh it’s Fox News, don’t know how or why the TV was tuned to that channel. Then I throw on some clothes and head to work.

But I did a horrible job of wasting time so now I’m at work way early and no one is around to annoy with my stupid jokes. I try to surf the web, but I already heard the story about the squirrel shooting, so that sucks. Then I figure I should start to work but instead sit there staring at the wall, trying to remember what it was that I was dreaming about earlier that morning. An hour or so later, after everyone has trickled in and you finally forget about how horrible your morning was, your buddy comes running in….

“Holy shit, dude. I overslept! I know I set the alarm and everything.... I must have screwed up the AM/PM or something. This SUCKS man!!”

Poor guy. Maybe I’ll send him that article about the squirrel to brighten his day.





Read more ...

Eye Test: Just Say No To Abstinence

Hope for your sake you can read this:




Read more ...

Nathan's Champ!!

Joey Chestnut scarfed down a whopping 68 hot dogs for a new worlds record and captures his third straight Nathan's July Fourth hot-dog eating contest at Coney Island.

Chestnut, hoisted the American flag and then stood proudly like an Olympic athlete as "The Star-Spangled Banner" played following his 68 to 64 1/2 dog victory over his archrival, six-time titleholder Takeru Kobayashi.

"This is great," Chestnut told ESPN, which broadcast the 10-minute contest live. "After the second minute, I knew that my body was cooperating and it was going to be hard to beat me."

The champion said he planned to celebrate his victory Saturday night with a lighter touch: a cobb salad with ranch dressing.

I wonder if these guys use wet wipes??




Read more ...

No Peeking

We use public restrooms quite frequently in our day to day lives. At malls, restaurants, and at the movies just to name a few. And when I approach the stalls, instinctively I enter a zone learned early on in my childhood where certain rules MUST be followed. These rules can not be and must not be bent at all. I always believed that every dude had learned these rules early on in their lives. Yet, over and over again I find myself at the stall, when another dude will come and break one of these rules. So as sort of a public service, please read and follow these rules:

1) Your head and eyes must always be focused on the wall directly in front of you; never shift your sight left or right no matter what.
2) Allow at least one stall between yourself and other restroom occupants. If there are no other occupants go to the farthest stall from the door. Actually just stay as far away as possible.
3) Conversation should be extremely limited, even if a friend happens to be relieving himself at the same time only, the bare minimum please.
4) Never flush, you don’t want to touch the stall handle and the infinite number of germs collected on it. Luckily most urinals today have the auto flushing systems.
5) Throughly wash your hands, then use the paper towel to open the door and exit the restroom.
6) Never ever poo in a public toilet. If you can hold it, just wait. Squeeze that sphincter and get home ASAP.

These rule should be followed by every guy entering a restroom. Never deviate from them. They are very very important.

Here is a game to help you figure out which stall to use.






Read more ...

Such An Asswipe

I went over to a friends place for some beer and food, cause well, I was bored.

After an hour of drinking beer and playing video games I had to go tinkle in the little boy’s room.

As I was draining the ole anaconda… I noticed a pack of Wet Wipes next to the toilet. So I washed my hands, got back to the living room and asked him about the wipes.

“Hey dude, what are the wipes for?”

He said to me, “Well, mudbutt, they are to make my cheeks look like Mr. Clean’s head. And if I want to slap a wet nap between my cheeks like my butt just had a bucket of chicken wings – then that’s nobodies beez wax!! Oh and it feels great too!!”

On the drive home later that evening, I began to ponder the thought. Should I go and purchase some wet wipes for my sexy butt. I mean I’ve always figured toilet paper was good enough. I understand that sometimes you feel like all the toilet paper is doing is moving shit things around. So if I were to add a wet wipe into the mix suddenly my ass would feel like it was staying at the Ritz-Carlton.

I know that it’s gonna be a big jump. I’m not sure I’m prepared to just set that box of wet wipes on the back of the toilet and display to the world that I have a squeaky clean booty. Maybe I’ll wait till late one night, lock the doors, and put on some smooth jazz as I let the velvety caress of the wipes take me to nirvana.

Wonder what the wife is gonna say when she sees the wipes next to the toilet.

I don’t know what to do…

Read more ...

Farting In Public

There is this guy at work, who will remain nameless because he does read this blog every now and then, who farts almost on a daily basis around all of us. With not a bit of bashfulness he lets them go like nothing happened and keeps going with his day.

Yet as natural and commonplace as the act is, others are still embarrassed to let it rip in public places and around others. I personally find it funny to cut the cheese around my wife and family. Especially the silent ones!! The other night she went to bed before me, and she had the fan facing her. So I decided to let one rip into the fan and she woke up from the stink… it was gut bustingly hilarious!!!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!

There are those who seem to think that it’s “not cool” to fart in public. To them I say, “ppssshhhh!”

Yet I do understand that sometimes it’s probably better to hold it in. Like say during a job interview. Probably not a good idea, you best clench up and hold it. Just wait till you get through the interview and let it rip when you get outside. Times like these call for squeezing the ole sphincter.

But when you’re around friends what’s the big deal. When you’re in an elevator who cares. Besides “whoever smelt it dealt it.” Play the blame game. So let one rip and don’t be embarrassed. Why should you feel that you will be ridiculed, for something that is so natural?

So when you have to toot, do you let the vapors go or do you squeeze like your like life depends on it.


Read more ...

The Week That Was

In case you missed it....

• Josh Brolin's first pics as Jonah Hex
• New Moon Trailer was debuted at MTV awards
• Bruce Campbell confirms a remake of Evil Dead
• Bringing Summer to Dollhouse?
• Auto-Erotic Asphyxiation... just becareful you don't want to end up like David Carradine
• Freakishly-Long-Tongue Girls... ist this hot???
• Eminem was t-bagged by Bruno
• The first signs of Judgement Day
• Playstation's new PSP Go
• Halo Reach is announced fanboys have nerdgasms
• Metal Gear rising to Xbox 360

Read more ...

E3's Big 3 And You Get To Meet Milo!!!

All three console makers have had their time in the spotlight at E3. There were tons of game announcements and new hardware announcements.

Real brief, Nintendo’s presentation sucked, a few new games but nothing exciting. They announced the Wii motion plus, blah blah blah…. in general it sucked.

PS3, had a few new game announcements, and a few exclusives that looked awesome. They had a Wiimote like motion controller. But the biggies for them were MAG and God Of War 3. Mag looked amazing in all its 128 vs 128 fps. And the visuals for GOW3 of course looked stunning.

But definetly, by far the Xbox 360 team were the clear cut winners at this years conference. They came up with Project Natal, the new wireless controller that has been around since the dawn of time. That controller being you! That’s right folks, you no longer need a plastic controller and be able to quickly push buttons, because you use your entire body as the controller. The system has a full body motion sensor that will mimic what you do in your living room, on screen. Amazing right! Check out these links to view it in action!

http://www.xbox.com/en-US/live/projectnatal/

http://www.youtube.com/xboxprojectnatal#uploads/3/I9tmr8VDqN8

It's really mind blowing stuff!!

But wait, after that announcement, the team over at Xbox invited Lionhead’s Peter Molyneux to demo what they have created with Project Natal.

This is where shit just gets insane. Watch this video….



Molyneux demoed a human interacting with a computer generated character, named Milo, using Project Natal’s technology. That’s right interacting! Milo recognized the person, conversed with her, even read off a piece of paper that she had written on!

So what does this mean you ask….

Xbox 360 + Project Natal = Milo

And what about when Milo becomes self aware???

Milo = Skynet!!!!



Read more ...

Would You Wednesdays On Mondays

Would you rather...

Would you rather be late to every event in life but be on time for your wedding

or

be on time for everything and be late to your wedding?
Read more ...